Ah, Pinterest — a favorite among crafty types and office drones trapped in their cubicles who are trying to live vicariously through crafty types. It’s a veritable fountain of DIY projects, some worthwhile, and some that seem dreamt up by a methed-out version of Lisa Frank.
Here are a handful of projects that fall into the latter category. Ain’t nobody got time for ’em.
1. This poisonous-looking bread fashioned from seven separately-mixed and kneaded doughs.
2. This Pikachu fashioned from rice.
3. This aberration that requires you to stay awake 48 hours straight to add each layer of jello.
4. These cupcakes baked in tin cans because who wants the convenience of a muffin pan.
5. These individually dyed strands of linguine WHICH ALL TASTE THE SAME.
6. This cake that involved persuading macarons to defy gravity.
7. Baking six different colored sponge cakes and then arranging them in tiny cubes, a project that will take the rest of your earthly days.
8. This timesuck that combines cupcakes and makeup to form the most Pinterest thing ever pinned.
9. Anything that involves gluing books together rather than reading them.
10. Hiding perfectly good candy inside these frankly ugly cookies that took 30 steps to make.
11. These crocheted egg cozies when why not just eat the damn egg already.
12. This cauliflower poodle.
13. This ottoman, for the person with too many spare tires and not enough living room clutter.
Want more? There’s 29 of these ain’t-worth-it projects you can check out over at Offbeat. (Again, well done with the captions, anonymous genius.)